friday's confessional: august 5

Last week, I backed into the sister a-go-go's car. I backed into it while it was parked IN the driveway.

I simply nestled myself into Sir Rodney, turned the key and went into auto pilot; back, back, backing down the long, long driveway. As I happily backed my way out of the long, long driveway I even did a little patty-pat-pat on the back as to how well I was doing. I'm am not really very good at driving in reverse. There are walls on either side of the driveway. Wonky low walls that are difficult to navigate. There is more than enough space on either side but the trickery of those walls fools you into thinking you are about to bumper-car into them.

I used to make mr. a-go-go back the car out but I decided to a-go-go up and just do it already. At first I was stop and go. I'm sure it was quite comical really as I inched Sir Rodney, ever-so-slowly down that long, long driveway in a less than straight line. Poor Rodney would swivel one way then the other as I over thought and over corrected the whole situation. Eventually, I manifested a little bit of Elvis magic and just backed the heck up. Which is what I was doing before I smacked the sister-ago-go's car.

I got in the car, rolled down the window and stuck my head out to gauge my distance with the wall and backed up. Confidently so as I was now a pro you see. As I was doing it I thought how much faster I was gassing it and then I thought "Oh, this is how people back up over their pets" and at once I imagined I was about to back over the deaf orange and white tom-cat that roams the neighborhood when BLAM!

You might wonder how on earth I managed to not see an entire vehicle parked in the driveway and well...in all honesty I have to tell you I never looked. We don't park cars in the driveway here. Two cars go in the garage and Sir Rodney hangs out in the back just to the side of the garage. Had I actually looked in the mirror I would have seen said vehicle but nope, I was on autopilot and simply backed, backed, backed myself outta there like the bees knees I thought I was.

I am sooooo not the bees knees. And now, I am afraid to back out of the driveway.

Eh-oh!

Is it wrong that I woke up this morning craving graham crackers with cool whip and m&m's? Not only did I wake up craving my most favorite bad for you snack ever but I craved it in the manner in which I used to snack it...with a viewing of Teletubbies. I do adore me the Teletubbies. The first year at least, back before they crammed all the episodes into their own version of a NuNu only to be regurgitated out over and over again in the same but slightly different episodes.

I miss the theme song and the "Uh-Ohs!" and Dipsy's funky soul brother dance moves. I miss the fighting over the Tutu and Lala's Isadora Duncan tribute. I miss the "run aways" and the slightly H.G. Wells feeling of it all. I once read an excellent paper someone wrote comparing the Teletubbies and their environment to the Morlocks and the Eloi of The Time Machine. So fabulous! I know there are many people who are fearful of the whole Teletubby phenomenon but I just loved the design of the characters and the colors. From a child development point of view, while I don't think watching television under the age of two is a good idea, if a child were to watch, Teletubbies was in fact developmentally appropriate no matter how freakish you think it may be. Of course parents wouldn't like it, it was geared for two year olds! Repetition is your friend when you are two. When yo uare an adult it is a little bit tedious.

It is quite possible you are still thinking "What? Graham crackers with m&ms and Cool Whip?" I know, it sounds like processed food-sugar-overkill and it is. It's also extremely yummy and addicting and the last thing anyone should eat especially when they are couch bound with the evil cold, flu, sick that is circulating. My fingers are twitching. It was an accidental snack based on an event I did for a children's book years and years ago. We needed a snack for the kids and wanted to decorate cookies but realized we did not have the budget to accommodate the more than one hundred kids that generally showed up for my storytime. My partner in crime at the time thought that graham crackers and Cool Whip would be in our price range so we picked up boxes and boxes and sweet cereal and fruit and sprinkles and made it an out and out sugar fest. When it was over, we had some leftovers and I was starving so I topped my cracker with bananas and...ahem...lucky charms and um, m&m's and well, a new addiction was born. It works best if you ice your cracker, sprinkle it with the sweets and then set it aside so that the cracker gets a little soft. Disgusting, I know but really it isn't. Just don't ask the husbandman. He won't even try it, but he is good that way. I generally hit the craving around November and I buy a box of crackers, a tub of the white stuff and a bag of m&ms and eat myself silly until one the packages is empty then I am done. I didn't do it this past November and I'm thinking maybe....you'll still be my friend, right?