Wednesday, January 30, 2013

so far...

So far, 2013 is not what I was trying to so positively visualize. I was trying to embody positive thinking...magical thinking and well...then the allergy attack to end all allergy attacks hit. I was under seige by a polyp the size of a small planet and after two weeks of misery, not sleeping, not eating, not functioning really, I managed to get into the doctor who diagnosed...allergies. The good news was there was no infection taking over so I did not need to get all cozy with another round of antibiotics. The bads news was I had to...have to wait it out. I pleaded and sobbed for some steroids if only to shrink the planet camping out in my left nostril and to unmuffle my sadly muffled hearing and with much hemming and haw-ing, the doctor gave in and gave me a very short stint to have an affair with. It was fleeting. At least it managed to bully the polyp away but I am stil more snurfly than not and while my left ear unmuffled, my right ear decided to get in on the game. I am seriously, a mess. I am however, grateful the attack has remind upper respiratory and not lower. I do quite like being able to breathe even though I am not breathing my best, at least I am not wheeze wheeze wheezing away. I do feel like one big sad raccoon.

What else is new?

The thing with chronic allergies as an adult is that it is difficult to appear presentable and professional. People give you a wide berth thinking you are either contagious or sloppy or crazy. I am mostly embarrassed and that ain't  good for one's selfer. If this keeps up for another week it is back to the doc for another looksie. I wish I oculd figure out what brought on this attack. All I can think of is a short hike we did end of December.  I can't get outdoor exercise if I am allergic to the outdoors but I really need to get outdoors and exercise. Exercise keeps your body healthy unless you're me...then you just get sick. All the while this is going on, I am still trying to visualize health and an alergy free life. I slept on the sofa for twoo weeks so I could sit up and as I snurfled and sobbed myself to exhasution I would mantra..."Tomorrow when I wake up, I will breathe deep through my nose and into my chest. I will feel good. I will feel healthy."

I'm still reciting it...

Earlier this week I managed to haul my tukis to the lab for bloodwork and what ensued was a comedy of errors. It was one of those things that so lacked organization, professionalism and the like that had I been someone less me than me it could have gotten ugly. For starters, the lab changed their hours so that I only had one day where I could get in. I had to cancel a doctor's appointment due to that snafu. I finally get in and they can't find my order. It's a standing order, mind you and I have been there three times before but nothing.She cals the doctor's answer. She clls back three times and finally gets someone and they fax the order through. I am not certain why it isn't in their computer system but it could be they don't use a computer system. Hello? This is 2013! Get with it! The office is actualyl moving in two days and while they are still open for blood work, they do not have a chair or table set aide to procur your blood so I am sitting in a rolling office chair, holding my arm on my lap and she preps me and jabs me and gets two vials out of me. As the second vial is filling, she unties the blue rubber evil thing around my arms and pops in tube number three and....nothing. It would appear I ran out of blood. We both look at it and say "Huh" and I really want to start laughing and so I do. She tries another vial but nothing. She looks at me and I toss her my left arm and we go through it again but my veins seem to have made a run for it. I usually give blood and have no problem. Large veins, good flow. I'm all about cooperation. She finally gets the last vial filled and I am off for a morning grocery run all swadled up in white tape and cotton. The brusies come later.
Now, I could have pitched a fit. I could have. But really, it was 8am and I really wanted to have a good day and so I rolled with it. I snarked out in my head but chanted to myself the one rule I know above all else. You can't really control what happens to you, you can only control your reaction. And so I did.
Yesterday I got a phone call with my lab results and while I orignally was off the charts hypothyroid it seems I am now hyperthyroid. Which sucks but explains my recent bout of crazy low body temp, hair falling out, and hot flash city. The poor guy on the phone was only calling to relay my results but I broke down and told him I don't feel well. I have not felt well since beginning any thyroid meds. I am tired of feeling poorly and frankly I feel like crap ALL THE TIME. He felt bad and told me he would relay it to the doctor , which he did but for now she has said all they can do is lower my dose to the previous dose which still had me feeling like crap!
I need to bone up on thyroid know-how. I also need to remember my password so I can get into my lab results. I am thinking I am adrenal wonky (janeray, sound familiar?) and need to arm myself with knowledge so I can nip this and fast! I might also need to find a new doctor. Oy! had your year been? Tust me when I say I laugh about this all the time. Sometimes it is whimpering but mostly I am as cheerful as I can be because what's the point of purposeful misery?

We have had some stunning sunsets this month and that's something to swoon over.


  1. Well done for being such a trooper.It all sounds a bit much. You just have to see the funny side sometimes, don't you, otherwise we'd probably all go potty. I thought I had had a tough day. I love the bright reds and pinks.

  2. "You can't really control what happens to you, you can only control your reaction." - yes. This! Truer words were never spoken, or written, and I needed to read these words this week :)

    As for the adrenal thing - while my adrenal tumor definitely caused some feeling-awful-all-the-time and some emotional-meltdownability, it was pretty different than the "adrenal fatigue" issue that has gotten a lot of press in the last year or so (which my entire medical team believes is a myth designed to sell supplements and services, and I tend to agree). But the worst I ever felt was before my surgery, when I was on the wrong meds for the wrong condition - which, similar to what I've heard about meds for thyroid condtions, made me feel worse than the disease itself. Eventually I just refused to take any meds for it at all, and felt much better. Meds can really mess with the brain!

    Sigh. I feel for you. While I've never had thyroid issues, I can relate 100% to the allergy thing. I don't get sniffly as much as I get red-eyed and cough-y, but yes, people think I'm contagious and I'm not! Hate. That.

  3. dr. stacey's prescription:

    * grocery-store-rental-super-steamer-cleaner the rugs of the tiny casa
    * INDOOR exercise (not THAT kind, jeez), perhaps involving a Bollywood Dance Workout DVD (maybe this one?
    * big, happy, jekked-out, dilly-ized BUTTON that reads JUST ALLERGIES to be worn at work and into the 'real' world
    * and a visit to l.a.


  4. Poor dear.
    Allergies AND thyroid?

    My January was exciting because my asthma medicine stopped working. I would wake up two/three times a night, coughing and gasping for breath. But I saw my NP and she switched my meds and now I CAN BREATHE!!!!!

    People who do it without problems don't understand how wonderful it is when you CAN take a deep breath. Lucky so and so's!

    Also, if you are going to switch doctors, might I suggest going to a Nurse Practioner? I have found them to be superb listeners and problem solvers.

    Sending you much love and healing light!